my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
