but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
