is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
