lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
