Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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