Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
