No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
My life is pants optional.
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