Barsexuality is the new black.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
They have beer where we have blood.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
