I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I touched a dick in church today
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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