very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
false alarm, still single
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
