The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
