just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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