I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
