I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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