I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize