i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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