I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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