we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
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