This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
