Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
