I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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