Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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