if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
