So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Randomize
