wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
