i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
