Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
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