Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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