imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
