Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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