You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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