Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
