Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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