He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
