No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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