I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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