Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize