I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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