I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize