Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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