she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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