hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
