Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
