Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Are these your boobs on my camera?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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