But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
