im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
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