So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Panties = found
Randomize
