so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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