Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
