the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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